My Story. Part 4. Aquagenic Pruritus and Systemic Nickel Allergy Syndrome

  I just exercised. Ran for 20 minutes and did a strength workout. I got sweaty and stinky (my kids will attest to that, they like to sniff around and say “ew, you stinky mama!”). It was 8pm, my kids were awake, I knew I wanted to get them to bed… but I also wanted…

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Humans of Vulvodynia Society

I recently submitted my story to a new “Humans of Vulvodynia Society” survey from ME + MY V. This blog has some wonderful information, and I am especially interested in reading about other perspectives about vulvodynia. If you have vulvodynia, I encourage you to share your story (you can do so anonymously if you wish). The…

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My Story. Part 3. Trial and Error.

Lidocaine jelly. That’s the first thing I tried. I was told to lather it all over my vulva and vagina and wait 15-30 minutes before intercourse for everything to go numb. It seemed so simple. I was shocked that I hadn’t thought of something like that before. The way my vulvodynia was described to me…

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My Story. Part 2. Recognizing Something was Wrong and the Diagnosis

Hey there. It’s me again. Ready to write some more. I feel hesitant already, knowing that this will surface some deep emotions I try so hard to forget. But, I know I need to do this. Here goes nothing. Intercourse was painful for me. So, very painful. Like crying-in-the-fetal-position-for-hours-after kind of painful. We discovered this…

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Medical Journey: Elevator Pitch

I wanted to do a QUICK elevator pitch of my medical journey with vulvodynia, so that there is context when you read the other posts about what has helped/what hasn’t. I will keep updating this post throughout the course of this blog. Thanks! … I was diagnosed in 2015 (after I had my kids) when…

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The Power of Visualization

My heart aches. I yearn for him to return. He will be gone for months and months for military training and I miss him desperately. Sure, I can handle the day to day responsibilities of our family. I write him letters and it feels like I am talking with him. I know how he would…

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First Comment…

“What kind of weirdo, freaky exhibitionist wants to post this kind of crap? Keep it between you and your gynecologist. They get paid to hear you whine about your lady parts. Even your husband doesn’t want to read this. Ew. Just stop it.” This. This is exactly why women are afraid to be open about…

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Symptoms and Effects of Vulvodynia

Stabbing pain. Burning. Itching. Glass shards. Every step is torture. Electric shock. Raw, tearing skin. Rose thorns inside me. Extreme tightness. These are very common ways women describe what having vulvodynia feels like. I have felt: 7/9   Excruciatingly painful intercourse. Can’t sit for long periods of time. Lost my job because of it. Can’t…

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The Purpose of Sandpaper and Glass

I’d been contemplating starting a blog for awhile now. At least a year and a half, in some form or another. In March 2016 I had a surgery for my vulvodynia. Up until then, I had kept my condition very private. I considered it in the “don’t ask, don’t tell” category of topics. Possibly in…

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Here Goes Nothing…

This is very vulnerable for me. Me, of all people. The person who has spent the past two years urging youth to be vulnerable. Yearning to foster a world of more openness, oneness, and empathy. Me, the person who will virtually tell any person our struggle if asked. Me, the person who has learned that…

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