Sorry, Not Sorry.

Is my insecurity showing? Yes, yes it is. Sorry if I share too many details. I am not trying to be insensitive, rather the opposite. I have learned through speaking with many women who have vulvodynia, that the more honest I can be about my experiences, the better I am able to help others.  I’ve…

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My story. Part 1. The Early Years.

My medical history is a long, complicated, intertwined, and emotional one. It takes me to a place of incredible vulnerability. Reliving moments of hopelessness, let-downs, and anger. For this reason, I have been putting off writing this. But as each day passes, I feel frustrated with myself for not writing it down. For not getting…

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The Power of Visualization

My heart aches. I yearn for him to return. He will be gone for months and months for military training and I miss him desperately. Sure, I can handle the day to day responsibilities of our family. I write him letters and it feels like I am talking with him. I know how he would…

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What is in my Amazon Cart?

As open as I am about having vulvodynia, there are times when I feel incredibly self-conscious and a little embarrassed about it. Today is one of those days. I had pelvic floor PT yesterday and my physical therapist recommended a few products to order on Amazon. I got online today and added a TheraWand, a lubricant, and a book to…

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First Comment…

“What kind of weirdo, freaky exhibitionist wants to post this kind of crap? Keep it between you and your gynecologist. They get paid to hear you whine about your lady parts. Even your husband doesn’t want to read this. Ew. Just stop it.” This. This is exactly why women are afraid to be open about…

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Symptoms and Effects of Vulvodynia

Stabbing pain. Burning. Itching. Glass shards. Every step is torture. Electric shock. Raw, tearing skin. Rose thorns inside me. Extreme tightness. These are very common ways women describe what having vulvodynia feels like. I have felt: 7/9   Excruciatingly painful intercourse. Can’t sit for long periods of time. Lost my job because of it. Can’t…

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The Purpose of Sandpaper and Glass

I’d been contemplating starting a blog for awhile now. At least a year and a half, in some form or another. In March 2016 I had a surgery for my vulvodynia. Up until then, I had kept my condition very private. I considered it in the “don’t ask, don’t tell” category of topics. Possibly in…

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